Jude: Just as you are? Not thinner? Not cleverer? Not with slightly bigger breasts or slightly smaller nose?
Shazzer: Well, f*** me.
Tom: This is someone you hate right?
Bridget: Yes, yes, I hate him.
Arthur Abbott: Say a man and a woman both need something to sleep in and both go to the same men's pajama department. The man says to the salesman, "I just need bottoms," and the woman says, "I just need a top." They look at each other and that's the 'meet cute.'
Arthur Abbott: He let you go. This is not a hard one to figure out. Iris, in the movies we have leading ladies and we have the best friend. You, I can tell, are a leading lady, but for some reason you are behaving like the best friend.
Iris: You're so right. You're supposed to be the leading lady of your own life, for god's sake! Arthur, I've been going to a therapist for three years, and she's never explained anything to me that well. That was brilliant. Brutal, but brilliant.
Toby: I need your advice man. I got lady troubles.
Viola: I'm here for you bro. I got a lifetime of knowledge.
Duke: Ok, w-why do you have tampons in your boot?
Viola: Um, I get really bad nose bleeds?
Andrew: So you stick 'em up your nose?
Viola: Yeah! What, you've, you've never done that?
[Boys shake head]
Viola: Oh my! Beckhem does it all the time.
Viola: Yes. Look, let me show you how to do it. Take that off and whatever that is, and, and you stick it right in. It absorbs right up!
Duke: That's disgusting!
Andrew: Oh my god! You're room-mates a freak!
Andrew Paxton: We'll tell my family about our engagement when I want and how I want. Now, ask me nicely.
Margaret Tate: Ask you nicely what?
Andrew Paxton: Ask me nicely to marry you... Margaret.
Margaret Tate: What does that mean?
Andrew Paxton: You heard me. On your knee.
Margaret Tate: [she kneels] Fine. Does this work for you?
Andrew Paxton: Oh, I like this. Yeah.
Margaret Tate: Here you go. Will you marry me?
Andrew Paxton: No. Say it like you mean it.
Margaret Tate: Andrew.
Andrew Paxton: Yes, Margaret.
Margaret Tate: Sweet Andrew.
Andrew Paxton: I'm listening.
Margaret Tate: Would you please, with cherries on top, marry me?
Andrew Paxton: Ok. I don't appreciate the sarcasm, but I'll do it. See you at the airport tomorrow.
Mary: He MySpaced me.
Joshua: Oh girl I don't know about that... My trampy little sister says MySpace is the new booty call.
Gigi: Hey sorry to bug you again! Uh quick question.
Alex: What's going on?
Gigi: Ok I'm making out with this guy, PG stuff. but he mentions he's going out of town so he's gonna be out of touch.
Gigi: But maybe he is going out of town.
Alex: To where? New Guinea? Where's he gonna be that he's gonna be out of touch?
Gigi: Opens bathroom door - Where are you going out of town to again?
Gigi: So what now I'm just supposed to turn from every guy who doesn't like me?
Alex: Uh. Yeah!
Gigi: There's not gonna be anybody left.
Let me know some of yours - and your favorite part!